Family Problems

Posted on 21 Mar 2026 @ 4:34pm by Lieutenant JG Ryan Collingway & Lieutenant Nicholas Miller

1,676 words; about a 8 minute read

///Mess Hall////
///After hours////

After a fresh shower and a new uniform, Ryan made his way to the mess hall. He still had a few hours left before bed and decided to get a drink. Of course the alcohol on the Arawyn was replicated and carefully monitored. It was better than nothing, however, so he enjoyed it as he watched a view of the colony.

With an armload of research Nick fumbled his way to a nice window seat and plopped down everything he'd carried with him from quarters. He'd been reading for hours and while desperate for a break had still brought it all with him. An incredibly interesting study on anxiety and its transition into other conditions had resulted in a substantial rabbit hole that had eaten away most of his evening. This was a forced break, Miller would never get to sleep without taking a few minutes to relax his thoughts.

A familiar face was surprising at this hour but Nick smiled and gave a half-wave as he went to get himself something to unwind. The pile of PADDs he returned to caused him to shake his head and he looked over to Ryan. "I swore I was going to sleep early tonight....." he said as he sat with a chuckle. Almost as an act of defiance he pushed his research materials a few inches further away from his reach. "How's your night going?"

"Better than my day," Ryan said, deciding to join him. The sheer amount of data padds looked monstrous and threatened to overtake the table. "What's that? Patient files of the senior staff?" he joked.

"Oh if that were the case I'd have a lot more." Nick smirked and organized the chaos for a second. "I just got a random fascination with something and got so wound up it wasn't worth sleeping. "The recent medical issues left a lot of parents and supporting family quite concerned, not that I can blame them. So I attempted to look into something else just on a whim as a distraction. Turns out I'm even more unsettled than before."

Reaching into his uniform Nick produced a tiny silver flask and waved it for just a moment. "I had a rough day myself." Removing the textured cap he poured a solid portion into the mug of espresso in front of him. "Being a counselor has benefits you know. Nobody wants to talk to you unless they have to but you can learn a lot by listening. Like who has the good stuff..." Miller trailed off as he offered the flask to Ryan. In his field Miller had no need to chase advancement or pursue authority, his purpose was to try and make things better both for the individual and the ship as a whole. "It's pretty tasty if you'd like."

Nick put the flask within reach of Ryan but sat back and stared at his research materials. "You know, I really dislike myself some times. Sure I could always work harder and do more to help the crew, but there's also that part that wonders how fate decides responsibility." He picked up the flask and poured a portion into his coffee before a sip. "It would be so lovely to just be confident all the time, to have certainty in all your decisions." He took another sip and smirked for a moment at a passing thought. "I guess we do the best we can with what we have, far better to chase a dream than endure a nightmare."

Ryan said nothing for a moment, digesting what he said. "I suppose that's true," he admitted. "I can't really talk to Doctor Emerson about her personal life during our sessions, otherwise she would accuse me of using my time to deflect or stall the session. At the same time, it is awkward talking to someone who knows your most intimate secrets in a normal setting. Guess it's fortunate that you're not my counselor." he added with a smirk.

He briefly went to get a cup of coffee, but he didn't take the flask. Not yet. Without asking he took one of his many data padds and briefly skimmed through it. "Wow. That is a lot of words to describe anxiety. No wonder you can't sleep. Not exactly easy reading. My advice? Try to prioritize your mental health too. Especially when so many people are stressed out about vaccines and whatever else."

"No one is perfect," he added. "We just think we have to be."

Nick nodded in agreement. "Even if the goal is impossible, there is nobleness in the attempt. The real challenge is minding the line between healthy pursuit and obsession." He stood and went to get himself a glass of cola and returning to his seat poured a small portion from the flask. " Always helps to have friends in the right places too...." he said with a smirk, looking at the glass before taking a test-sip. Nodding in approval Nick set the glass down. "It can be hard being a counselor too, hard to find another officer that doesn't see me and immediately start analyzing what they say and do around me."

"Oh don't get me wrong. I totally am," Ryan said, somewhat jokingly. "Can't have you adding to my file. But I suppose I do have things easier. Most people don't bug me about fixing something when I'm on break. I can see it being different for those in the medical field. They look at you as a doctor first before a person. That must be challenging."

"Why did you decide to do it?" Ryan asked. "Get into counselling?" He felt at ease enough to pour a little of the flask into his coffee. He took a sip and coughed.

That question required a generous portion of the flask' contents into his cola and Nick sipped slowly thinking how best to phrase it. He took another sip and sighed. "You know, that's a great question." It was a unique sensation to be in a moment where it felt like he was the one being aided and while Miller paused his instincts told him this was a safe opportunity. "My Dad was a Security officer on board the USS Medusa. He was totally committed to the role. And he was good at it, but there were times where things were just going crazy. Another ship would run into something serious, a colony in the middle of nowhere would have one group ready to kill another group. Mom had a tough time looking out for me and the same time keeping the old man's sanity together."

Nick stood and got himself another cola, while having a drink to loosen the nerves was one thing getting completely inebriated was another and he had a few early appointments that wouldn't go well if he stayed up too late. "I spent a lot of time observing them both. Mom and Dad both had strength but there were times where I felt like I just wasn't doing enough. I was a disappointment I suppose, growing up was a constant series of reminders where I could have done better." He smirked a bit, knowing he was letting out a lot but enjoying the fact that he felt comfortable enough to do so. It was a unique role shift. Another pour of the flask went into his cola and after a swallow he continued. "I got older and I started to understand that they were dealing with life too. Had a realization one day. Growing up I had always thought that my parents were 'adult' and that they'd figured out everything. The Medusa deployed on a mission and it went south, it was the first time I'd seen either one of them vulnerable."

Memories were flooding his thoughts but as he'd coached so many patients to do so Miller continued. "It... well things got ugly between them. Nothing they couldn't handle but Dad was trying to save the universe and Mom was trying to save the family. I only wanted to understand, to help somehow."

Ryan was concerned that the counsellor was sharing more than he wanted to due to the contents of the flask, but couldn't really stop him either. "I'm sorry to hear that. Doctor Emerson is wanting me to focus on ignoring my father's shadow in our next session and just focus on myself. It's easier said than done. Maybe I can invite you to that session as well," he joked.

He looked away. "Where I grew it...we were technically in Federation space, but just as the very border of it. None of the locals certainly considered us part of Starfleet. There was only one recruitment center in the whole city. My dad owned a distribution company, at least on paper. He was also in bed with the Orions, the Bree...you name it. That was what he wanted me to inherit. He also hated Starfleet with a passion. Viewed them as direct competition with too many ideals."

He took the flask and gave him a generous benefit himself. "I can't remember the exact moment I decided to leave...but let's just say I gave the Statfleet recruitment office quite a surprise that day," he chuckled. "And despite the constant attempts at my dad trying to convince me to quit, I haven't regretted it since. Definitely not since joining the Arawyn, at least."

He sighed. "The bottom line I guess is that we can't change who our parents are. Or try to fix them, in your case."

Ryan glanced at the time. "Argh, it's getting late and I still have no idea if I'm on punishment duty. I should get some sleep. It was nice talking to you, Nick," Ryan said, using his first name since he didn't seem to want the counsellor label tonight. "Thanks for the drink."

The two said their goodbyes for the night, and Ryan headed back to his quarters.

Lieutenant (JG) Ryan Collingway
Engineering Officer
USS Arawyn

Lieutenant Nicholas Miller
Counsellor
USS Arawyn

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